There is literally nothing like having the unexpected opportunity to connect with a girlfriend or sister and listen intently, be moved deeply by her story, her struggle. To pray with her, identify with her and encourage her. I would argue some of the most precious, blessed moments in this life are connecting with a friend, being invited into the pain, sharing the heavy load. It’s paradoxical, but so much more satisfying than a shopping spree and talking about nothing deeper than the forecast. With my energy tank on empty, actually it’s below ‘E’, I almost skipped our church’s women’s retreat last weekend. Talking for a living and loving it, honestly, sometimes on a weekend, the last thing I want to do is talk some more. I want to refill my tank so I have more to pour out the next week and show up for life with my everything, my best self. I want to dig in the dirt, talk to God and the flowers and just listen to what they have to say, in that still quietness. The flowers tell me about God’s amazing wisdom, love, faithfulness and creativity. God invites me to crawl up on His ample lap and just cry when the load seems too large. Lately there have been more tears spilled than usual. I was asked to go be ‘the Spark Plug’ that I supposedly am. LOL. I was like, ‘Dude (to my pastor-the most down-to-earth pastor in the world), Dude….you don’t realize it but there ain’t much spark in this ol’ plug at the moment. I am literally a sparkless plug!’ Never-the-less, after some gnashing of teeth, I said, ‘Yes’ to the ask and trusted the Lord to refill my tank soon. I confess that I didn’t want to go. Not because it isn’t fun to go to our women’s retreats-are you kidding me? We have the most amazing, wonderful group of sisters in our church whom I love. We laugh and cry together, connect deeply. It wasn’t that I didn’t want all that-it’s that my goal was to unplug from the world just enough to get my tank to register on the ‘E’ was my heart’s desire. The ‘yes’ felt hard. Obedient to the call I didn’t want to answer, I went anyway. It was such a ‘worth-it-hard’. I was incredibly blessed in unexpected ways. God had me. As it turns out-we can’t ‘out-give’ God, was proven true again.
This morning this theme birthed in my mind…-‘the-worth-it-hard.’ I was thinking about how the ‘worth-it-hard’ also translates to marriage as well as other aspects of life. Marriage-this day in age is easier to walk away from than to have lunch, sitting inside a fast-food restaurant (not that I’m promoting fast-food!). My goodness, it is easy to make an impulsive decision to end the ‘worth-it-hard’ and file for divorce. Please don’t hear what I am not saying-I’m not flinging shame at people who’ve gotten divorced. I myself, am divorced, almost 30 years ago now-so please know, I am not pointing fingers or chucking stones. I felt immense sorrow, loss, fear, pretty much all the things after my divorce. Completely humbled- I pass no judgement. At the same time….I learned a few things over the past 30 years. I got remarried 5 years later and have walked the ‘worth-it-hard’ for the past 23 years (as of this Friday, May 12th). It has been a long walk. There has been some mud, scrapes, some falling, some getting back up, some bandaging, some cleaning up the mess, and some healing. Sooner or later, most marriages will face the temptation of divorce, quitting, cashing it in. Marriage is a long walk, the Ultra-ultra Marathon. Sometimes a really tough climb, other times it feels like coasting. There are easy, happy, fulfilling periods and then there are times when you wake up in the morning and check your sanity. ‘What was I thinking?’ It can all feel so very too hard.
What is your ‘worth-it-hard’ you are being called to? Are you a weary parent? A weary adult taking care of aging parents? Weary from a tough marriage? Weary from career challenges? Weary from loneliness? Weary from trying to navigate your path?
In Parts 2 & 3 we look at what God has to say about the ‘worth-it-hard’. He tells us His grace is sufficient. He tells us there is joy in the ‘worth-it-hard.’ Stay tuned.
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