The things we pursue usually aren’t because we need or want them directly, we desire what we think they will give us.
There is an underlying feeling that we desire beneath all that we chase. When we golf for instance, we don’t pursue that sport simply for the sport, we play it because of what it gives us-maybe it’s the anticipation we have when we play each round, conditions change on the course, our bodies don’t perform exactly the same day to day, we aren’t robots after all and so each round is unique. Sometimes you find yourself in a swing funk which needs to be overcome-I’ve seen those funks last multiple rounds to swallow up a season. Overcoming it feels like a huge win. You never know when you will have the round of a lifetime. Maybe it’s the feeling of just being alive, getting some good dopamine flowing when you are out breathing in the fresh air, taking in the beauty of a manicured course. Maybe it’s connection that one gets while with his or her golfing buddies-the walk and talk while making the way around the 18 holes that sometimes feels like 27 depending on the day, or perhaps it’s the relaxation, a time to decompress and focus on something else other than work stress and responsibilities. Whatever the case, we don’t pursue what we pursue directly, there is always an indirect payoff.
So my question to you is….what are you wanting to accomplish that you aren’t yet pursuing? What habits are you not employing to propel you towards your goals? Could it be that you haven’t created a strong enough payoff attached to the goal to start building the habits that will get you there? What’s your why? How can you develop a compelling why? What feeling(s) are you thinking you will experience as a result of accomplishing your goal? What is your goal? Grab a pen and paper. Let’s do this exercise together. If you look down the road, imagine where you will be 1 year from now if you don’t start creating habits to accomplish your goal. Now look further down the road. Imagine where you will be 5 years down the road if nothing changes. What will you be doing? What will your typical day look like? What regrets will you feel? What will you miss out on because you didn’t make these changes? Ok, fast forward to 10 years from today. How old will you be? What do you imagine you will feel like physically, emotionally. Imagine your typical week. What will it look like? I want you to now look 25 years into the future. Rinse, repeat. What does it look like. Who will you be? Who is your circle of friends? What is a day in the life of them? What are they accomplishing? Are they excited and enthusiastic about life? Again, what is your typical week? What are your joy sources? Are they dependent on others in your life? Or do you have joy independent of others? Do you have any joy? Accomplishment?
You see-we become like the people we surround ourselves with. We become who we identify ourselves as. We become the daily habits we employ now. If you make some changes-adding healthy choices, eliminating unhealthy choices to your diet, for instance, you may not notice a ton of change in 24 hours. Start small. Take one thing that’ unhealthy that you want to eliminate (sugar for instance). Take one thing that you want to add that would be a great tasty addition (consider adding a healthy fat-avocados in your salads, or cooking with coconut oil instead of vegetable oil). The consistent application of small positive changes will allow the dam to burst. You may not feel boundless energy, or have your clothes fit looser in a week. If you do 10 pushups and 15 squats, you likely won’t feel ready to go run a Spartan race. But if you make these changes, do them consistently daily imagine where you will be in 6 months, a year…..5 years. Small changes, small habits added consistently will build.
I have done this and am realizing results already. Things I have added…..intermittent fasting, eliminating sugar, wheat, adding pushups and squats, writing daily,……will I have a book written in a week? No, but a book is being written, chapter by chapter, with consistent writing it’s happening. Mentally and physically I am seeing clarity and strength.
So….what’s holding you back? What small change will you commit to making today?
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